Thursday, January 28, 2010

Coping mechanisms

I'm guessing for a lot of my fellow weightwatching folk, that food is (mis)used as a coping mechanism. Really, I am not a great lover of food. Sure, I enjoy flavours/textures and can tell the difference between a good meal and a McRappy meal. But I am not driven to eat by my love of food.

For me, eating is usually a cover for something else. Like I'm trying to balance myself out.

Too tired? Well I cannot just grab a nap, and I have to keep going, so I'll chuck some sugary energy in.

A bit down? Stuck indoors, ill kids, too busy doing the mundane necessaries to stop and pamper myself, but chucking an extra helping of dinner my way is do-able.

Frustrated? House is a tip, kids being mentalists, no chance of getting any respite yet want to spare them from the anger seething through me? Time to chow down on something sweet and doughy.. take my anger out on ripping a bagel (or 3) apart.

Scared? Hubby not well again, redundancy and job instability, money worries (more than usual) own health not great in the winter, ongoing stressors with getting the boys assessed.. need a pick me up (more junk, which only worsens my health and the money situation)



So, now things are calming themselves, I need to change my method of coping.

Last night Seth was ill. Groaning and sobbing from 3pm. Could not eat dinner despite being hungry. Pale, dark eyes, burning up. Complaining of head, back and tummy ache. I gave him a sleeping bag and bucket and laid him on the sofa. After doing hubbys dinner when he got in and getting kids ready for bed I looked at Seth again. He felt sick. Great. I fetched him a bucket and wanted to go and make myself something to eat. To give me energy, boost my happy hormones, give me something to do while Seth got to sleep.

Instead I turned on the Wii fit and did 40 mins. By the time I'd finished my head felt more awake, babies were ready to be nursed, and Seth was asleep with his bucket still empty. Phew.

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