Thursday, May 26, 2011


Absolute top weight 234lb

Weight Goals:

lose the weight of eldest child (67lbs)
30% goal - fifth stone (164)
Lose 'The Things' (73lbs)
75 lbs off (159)
sixth stone (150) 
WW goal for gold membership (bmi 24.9)
Rhinoboy and a Thing 
40% goal 93.5lbs off - (140.5) 
seventh stone (136) 
100lbs off
wedding dress weight (as of final fitting) (129)
Emoboy and a Thing
50% goal (117) 

Fitness Aims:
Wii piggy Bronze July 17th 2011
Wii piggy Silver
Wii piggy Gold
BMI 'severely obese', not morbidly obese June 25th 2012
BMI obese, not 'severly obese' October 8th 2012
BMI overweight, not obese January 7th 2013
BMI "healthy"
Run 20 minutes straight December 20th 2012
Run 30 minutes straight & Run 5k Both(!) December 30th 2012
Complete C25K 5th January 2013
Super Sprint Triathlon December 28th 2012
Complete B210K 
100 press ups
200 sit ups

150 dips 13th February 2013
200 squats
complete 30 day shred 
September 2011
Sprint Triathlon

Clothes/size goals:

Out of joggers and back into 18s August 25th 2012
Bye bye loose linen old-lady stuffs - back into 16s November 18th 2012
size 14 - I have more than one pair of trousers again December 27th 2012
size 12 - it's like I have a wardrobe or something!
size 10, the clothes I adore 
Back into my wedding dress

Waist under 40" 
Waist under 32" (no longer "high risk" for diabetesJanuary 7th 2013
Waist in the 20s
Waist <27 font="font">
Waist-to-hip ratio <0.8>
Waist-to-hip ratio <0.7>
Hips under 40" 

Monthly Measurements - Weekly Weights








bust 52 47 50 45 42 42

waist  50 44 49 42 37 33

hips 51 50 52 47 46 42.5

upperarm 16 15 16 13.5 14 13

thigh 31 28 30 28.5 27 25

weight 232 220 231 201 192 184

  1. June 27 - 231  BMI 39.8
  2. July 4 - 216.5 *silver 7* *silver 7* *5% goal* BMI 37.2  
  3. July11 - 212 BMI 36.4
  4. July18 - 209 *silver 7* BMI 35.9
  5. July25 - 205.5 *10% goal* BMI 35.3
  6. Aug1 - 201 *silver 7* BMI 34.5
  7. Aug8 - 199 BMI 34.2
  8. Aug15 - 197 BMI 33.8
  9. Aug22 - 196 *silver 7* BMI 33.6
  10. Aug29 - 196 BMI 33.6
  11. Sept5 - 192.5 BMI 33 
  12. Sept12 - 189 *silver 7* BMI 32.4
  13. Sept19 - 187 BMI 32.1
  14. Sept26 - 186 BMI 31.9
  15. Oct03 - 189 BMI 32.4
  16. Oct10 - 187 BMI 32.1
  17. Oct17 - no w/i
  18. Oct24 - 190.5 BMI 32.7
  19. Oct31 - 186
  20. Nov7 - 191
  21. Nov14 - 194
  22. Nov21 - 196

That won't be me. 2 years on.

May 2009 - I was still working hard, good days and bad days. But I weighed somewhere in the 150s, a little overweight, but healthy shape and no-one (sane) would look and think I was fat. I even began to believe that I might be veering close to normal, and felt brave enough to post a photo of me in my swimmers.

I remember reading blogs where writers/dieters/fellow junkies would warn about going off the rails and gaining it all back. I know I laughed at the thought. How would I not notice that happening?! It was *such* a process going the other way, I couldn't imagine it.

Here I am 2 years later. I've not been unaware, but it has happened, or near enough. With the lack of job for Sam I've turned to food for comfort. He's been about so I've gone out with the kids walking less and less. Worrying about Malachi's health my own has been placed on hold. By trying to force myself to do it for my sister's wedding I put an unachievable goal in my way and defeated did the classic 'Whatever!' binge. Again, and again.

I feel totally shit. I am not depressed, I am aware that a few months hard work can undo 2 whole years. I have the written testimony here. Getting on the scales a week ago and seeing 220 flash up I felt like curling into a ball and sobbing. Then I wanted food. Instead I updated myfitnesspal and got my nose down.

Malachi's genetic testing has all come back normal, and he appears to be happy. I've got to stop beating myself up and look after myself too. He is having his next consultation way over in September. By then I can have dropped back down to 'overweight' and feel more confident when talking to the doctors.
Sam has a job offer, we're waiting on official confirmation but it's a pretty certain thing he'll be starting mid-June. Can stop using that as a reason for comfort eating, and feed both of us properly - he needs to lose weight and I can make that happen when he's working. I do all the food prep.

My sister is getting married in 2 days. I am huge, and will probably look back at the pictures wishing I'd managed to get weight shifted. I am too big for my dress and will be having to adjust it on the day. I am determined to enjoy myself though, giving myself a lot of coaching about how my worth isn't on a scale determined by my size. I want to believe it.

My aims -
  • to update here at least once weekly, hopefully more.
  • to stay wheat free
  • to enjoy drinking water
  • to eat good food
  • to exercise daily
  • to have one good thing to say about myself each day, non food/weight/appearance related
  • to weigh monthly to start. 
I will post my first weigh in on Seth's 6th birthday (!!) on June 1st. I am intending to stay cake free that day too ^_^ Once I have that weight I'll have a 'goal' weight in mind for July etc.

For the next week I will be aiming to eat 1200-1500 cals a day, wheat free, and to drink 2-3litres water a day. I'm back, and I'm so so determined that next year I *will* be one of those bloggers, in maintenance, who is warning about complacency.