Wednesday, October 31, 2012

Dumb Day

Spent yesterday feeling a bit off for most of the day - still got stuff done, but didn't feel right, and worried lots that I was coming down with a bug or something.
Woke up late, as Sam had the day off so no alarm. Sat up and saw 7.45 on the clock, and jumped up to get ready as was leaving for the gym in 5 minutes. Quick wash and dressed and out the door.

Cycle lvl 5 Kilimanjaro 15min  8.14km
Treadmill hill 10 15min 1.55km 46m

Shoulder press 25kg 3x12
Fly  47.5kg 3x12
Leg press 70kg 3x12
Leg extension 45kg 3x12
Abductor 56kg (6)6
Adductor 35kg (l5) 3x12
Pull down 47.5(kg 3x12

Not a bad session considering I wasn't awake yet, and hadn't eaten at all.

My sister was down for the afternoon, and so she and my mum came to grab me for lunch. We went to local garden centre and I had my first sandwich in AGES, as they do gluten free bread. It was a zillion points (13) but Bacon! and Brie! Toasted! Yum.

Once I got in, Sam and my brother went to see Skyfall. I felt better, but still kept going lightheaded whenever I moved fast, so I lay on the sofa and read and let the kids play lego Pirates on the xbox. Managed to chuck together a tea of cheese and fruit and ryvita with spreads for them, but really felt like crawling about and sulking. Then going into the cupboard to get a drink for Maya, I spotted my glasses case. Oh, yeh, glasses. Only been around 4 months since I wore them. Oh look, things aren't blurry now, and I feel like I can walk straight. Oh.

*Headesk* ....


So, I am not unwell. Just someone with prescription glasses that should be worn more than 3 days a year. Ahem.

The book was good though. Better when I could see each word.

walked/cycled/jogged - 7.67 miles

Tuesday, October 30, 2012

Packing away the summer foods, bringing out the winter stuffs..

Yesterday at weightwatchers meeting we were talking about the change to winter, and the fact that many of us want to hibernate as the dark cold weather draws in. The desire for comfort food is greater and lots of us struggle.

A member said that maybe it would help to think of food like we do clothes. We put away our summer clothes and get out the winter wardrobe, ready for the different weather. We don't keep wearing the summer stuff and suffering for it. This really made me think, it was a really helpful thing to have heard.

I do struggle with switching over to sensible winter food choices, still trying to plod along with my salads and berries. I don't get into a winter food routine and flounder almost every year around November.

I got home and cancalled my order for berries, yoghurt, meringues, salad, prawns.. the standard 'light, summer' foods I eat. Instead I ordered peppers and onion, to do a DIFFERENT chicken salad, root veg for soup, ingredients for beacon hill cookies, flan, pulled pork and a fish pie.

I'm going to put some energy into finding my winter food wardrobe, to help change the winter pattern I'd fallen into.

Today I made Beacon Hill Cookies and nibbled through a couple with a cuppa mid afternoon, really 'treaty' and luxurious feeling (if a little zingy!).
I also made a smoked haddock and prawn pie from a recipe in the booklet from weightwatchers meeting - was an easy one to use, just changed out the flour for gluten free flour.

Going to attempt making a flan in the next few days, and also have a pork shoulder to go in the slow cooker. Proper winter comfort food, without comfort eating.

Went for a run tonight, had a headache coming on, but talked myself into it. Now feel a whole lot better and ready for a good sleep with a satisfied belly and worked out muscles. ^_^

walked/ran - 3.81 miles


While it's not going to help me get to my overweight for 2013 goal, a maintain was what I was expecting. It's a bit odd, because I ate my weekly and daily points, but didn't use earned activity points, so *should* have lost. Am putting it down to water retention - I ate a lot of oats the last 3 days, so hopefully I'll get a good loss next week.

previous weight -198.5 BMI 34.1
current weight - 198.5 BMI 34.1
Loss - 0lb
% loss - 0%

We all committed to doing something this week, I told the group that I would gym 3 times, run 3 times, do aquafit and swim. Only 8 sessions of activity then! After meeting and popping to sainsburys for a flan tin (plotting to try a gluten free quiche this week) I went to the gym, and had a REALLY good session.

Cycle lvl 5 Kilimanjaro 15min  8.23km
Treadmill hill 10 15min 1.56km 47m

Shoulder press 25kg 3x12
Fly  47.5kg 3x12
Leg press 70kg 3x12
Leg extension 45kg 3x12
Abductor 56kg (6)6
Adductor 35kg (l5) 3x12
Pull down 47.5(kg 3x12

Home for the afternoon, got online shop sorted, have plans to make a pie from the 'my week' leaflet from todays' meeting, as well as Beacon Hill Cookies and pulled pork.

My sister came down to do aquafit with mum and me tonight, it was a good one. The more full-on trainer was there tonight - my quads ache!

Thinking about doing a nature walk with the halflings tomorrow, assuming it's not chucking it down - want to really get those miles in this week. :)

swam/ran/cycled/walked - 10.48 miles

Sunday, October 28, 2012


Woke up feeling very used and achey this morning. Slowly peeled myself out of the marshmallow hotel bed and got myself dressed for breakfast.

Couldn't eat the sausages or granola, as couldn't be sure they were wheat free, and my insides were already not happy. Really gripey tummy and felt rough and bloated. :(

Nutella and Bacon, two best breakfast foods
Tracy had her taxi back into London comp'd, and I mooched to the bus stop to get the buses home. Took less than an hour and £1.35, so was fairly chuffed, if in pain still with the IBS flare. Oats, sugar, grr.

Got in and watched Biggest Loser for a bit, and drank tea.

Sulked because I've eaten badly - not binged, or eaten over points, but just not the best food. I felt like going out and buying junk, thinking 'stuff it'

Instead I voiced my frustration, and got down to do some stretching/floorwork with Malachi. Spent a while reading blogs and perking myself up. This isn't *about* losing weight, or dieting. This is about being well and changing my lifestyle. I am WINNING at this.

Finally pulled myself off the sofa and went for a run, got a chance to try out my new gore tex Lunarfly and they were LUSH. Slippy, scary leaves no more. ^_^
It wasn't easy to spend those hours fighting the urge to go eat crap, it wasn't easy to pull my sulking self up and go out running. But by making new, good habits, by paving the way for myself with new shoes and the will to DO THIS FOR ME - it was doable. I can do it. I did. It was SO worth it.

I am now feeling balanced again. I am happy, I am healthier than I could have been.

walked/jogged - 4.7 miles



Muse were EPIC.

I've used most of my weeklies over the weekend - energy for bouncing about and the 2 hours it took to find our hotel post-gig was needed.

Spent the afternoon with my friend Tracy, met a few other Musers, real hardcore fans, living at the o2 for 2 days to be on the barrier, practically doing the tour around Europe.

Chugged coffee and flapjack/granola bars before heading to the queue at 5.30pm. It was so cold, although we're inside the o2 dome, it's really just a massive tent. Brr. Still, we got through within an hour or so, and ended up second line back on the right side of the stage - really not bad!

After the gig (and 3 miles worth of stomping/bouncing, according to the pedometer) we headed out, chatting to a few of Tracy's friends, before trying to find our way to Greenwich, to get a train over to Woolwich (and our hotel). After walking a fair while, asking at a Holiday Inn for directions, and with no juiced phone for googlemaps, we discovered there was a bus (well, two buses) that would take us straight over. Found our way to the nearest stop easily enough, and jumped onboard, giggling at how we'd used our 'extra hour' (you did remember to put the clocks back?). A few minutes from the Travelodge, Tracy called ahead to ask them to put the heater on in our room - they said we had no room. 0_0 They'd overbooked us, but were going to transfer us to another hotel.

Spent a few minutes at the bar with an Appletiser each, finding out that we were being sent to Bromley.

So, by 1.30am, I was halfway home, in a brand new travelodge that reeked of fresh paint, suffering with IBS after too much oat-eating.

Thank goodness for the extra hour!

walked/bounced/stomped - 6.1 miles

Friday, October 26, 2012

over-excitement and trying not to feed it

I'm still feeling a bit off, have a sore throat and feel slow to get going, but think I'm on the up..

Which is just as well, because it's Muse tomorrow!! Made my goal of being less than 200lbs for it, I've made myself a batch of soup to fill up on tomorrow morning, so I can forget thinking about food and just enjoy the rest of the day.

Have struggled with the cold today, and sugar cravings. Made myself a small flapjack, and again was very pleased with my 'trick' of adding banana to flapjack mix, so I don't wolf down the huge amounts of homemade flapjack I have stored.

Making a giant batch of flapjack used to be where I would fall down each week, midweek. I make enough to do breakfast for Sam, and for the kids to have some as snacks. It makes 28 HUGE portions, or 56 'regular' ones. The mixture together, without added raisins/syrup/seeds comes to 220 propoints, 10 OVER my total allowance for the week! I would, could and have, easily eat the whole lot to myself in an hour or two. Oats, Sugar, CARBS!!

So, I began mashing up a couple of bananas and mixing them into the tray before I bake it. Being near phobic to banana I CANNOT eat it, and so the midweekly tray bake session is no longer a danger for me!
Minor victory #1!

Went to the gym tonight and while there got a chance to check my vo2 max again - and got a 'normal' result of 34.9 ^_^ Also got the bike legs back after struggling so bad two days ago - pumped through the kilimanjaro (right uphill, and down) and got a stonking 5.53km in my 10 minutes! Minor victories #2&3

Cycle lvl 5 Kilimanjaro 10min  5.53km
Row 5.08min 1027m
Treadmill hill 10 15min 1.46km 44m

Shoulder press 25kg 3x12
Fly  47.5kg 3x12
Leg press 70kg 3x12
Leg extension 45kg 3x12
Abductor 56kg (6)6
Adductor 35kg (l5) 3x12
Pull down 47.5(kg 3x12

walking/cycling/rowing - 6.29 miles
31/31 propoints

Thursday, October 25, 2012

Metabolic syndrome

I've paid for the full version of the TactioHealth app I'd been using a while on my iPhone. It's been great for tracking my weight and setting weekly targets, but I was interested in tracking my activity, steps, weight, and measurements all in one app - so paid the upgrade.

It wanted WAY more information. I can track my blood glucose, cholesterol, pulse and pressure, weight, body fat, measurements, BMI and activity levels.

I'd tracked most of the information, and aside from my weight, size and waist it was all happy and green. Along the bottom edge of the 'home' screen there are 3 weight related disorders listed, and they're highlighted green through red, depending on your risk factors for each.

My cardiovascular risk is 'very low' at 1%, despite being obese, my activity, pressure etc are all good. Same with Type 2 Diabetes, 4/36 points puts me at 'very low risk' again. The third one was 'Metabolic syndrome' - I looked up the criteria online, and felt a little worried that I might be totally unaware of damage I'd already done.

My waist circumference is high, even now it's still above the threshold for concern. My BMI is certainly > 30, and has been for the majority of the last 8 years. My blood pressure is low, but that on it's own doesn't mean I'm ok. The numbers I was missing were my cholesterol and blood glucose (but really, the cholesterol is the 'biggy')

I've never had my cholesterol tested, I've always thought of it to do with 'old people' bizarrely. Being obese, and a drinker, and a former heavy smoker who has been largely inactive and eaten crap, I guess maybe that's a bit ignorant and a lot stupid.

So, we spent the morning as a family, took all 4 kids to see Brave at the cinema - free tickets, courtesy of National Schools Films Week, munched through a tub of chocolate covered raisins, before walking back up the hill to a bowl of yoghurt, meringue and strawberries, and a fudge bar. Then decided to go get these tests done at our local lloyds pharmacy. Could my intake of sugars have been any more ridiculous?

The tests took 15 minutes altogether. Blood glucose came back at 5.8mmol/l, which considering I'd stuffed 175g of pure sugar into my blood stream in the 5 hours previous, was a fairly good result!
Cholesterol test came back spot on too. All within normal range, and just a touch off 'optimal'. HDL was up at 1.39, with a ratio of 3.5. Triglycerides and LDL were well below the 'risk' line too. More activity and weightloss, while continuing to eat the HDL happy diet I'm on now, can only make it better, whoot.

5.91 miles walked.
31/31 propoints eaten (including over 200g of sugar for the day 0_0)

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

The little train that could

that's me, today, the little train. Chugging along, reminding myself every few minutes "I can, I can."

I've stayed on track, with good, whole food, even though I've felt AWFUL.

I spent 2 hours today going through my clothes *again* and getting anything that is slightly big, or makes me feel not-wonderful when I wear it. Went through my smaller clothes too, organising them all, and getting rid of anything that isn't going to make me feel fabulous when I wear it. I now have stuff to work my way down through, that will feel good to wear while it fits.

Felt huge amounts of motivation, looking at the clothes I have packed away that will fit when I'm at goal. They look like *my* clothes. A bit weird, comfy and colourful and just odd but fun. The kids were all looking through the things and asking me 'why did you get fat to wear boring clothes if you have these?' Well, QUITE!

Hope to be able to fill another bag like this in another couple of months. Have promised myself that next summer, when I'm at goal, I will buy myself a new beautiful wardrobe to keep my (small and perfect) collection of clothing in.

Went to the gym this evening. Really felt the aftermath of the wheat. Could barely get my legs going on the bike, but kept telling myself 'I can, I can' and eventually got through the 5km in 15minutes. 0_0

Cycle lvl 5 15min 5.35km
Treadmill 15min hill lvl 9 (1.55)
Treadmill fit test (34.9) 5min
Total - 1.99km 44mtrs

Shoulder press 25kg 3x12
Fly 45kg 3x12
Leg press 70kg 3x12
Leg extension 45kg 3x12
Abductor 56kg 3x12
Adductor 35kg (l5) 3x12
Pull down 47.5(kg 3x12

Tues - walked/cycled/ran - Nada
31/31 propoints eaten.

Weds - walked/cycled/ran - 7.28 miles
31/31 propoints eaten.


Ugh, I have had a really rough 36 hours.

Monday before Weightwatchers, I popped into the Co-op to grab something to eat so I'd not go to the gym on no fuel. I found a pack of Matteson's Fridgeraiders roast chicken, used to be something I'd get as a snack often, good protein rich, pre-portioned snack.

Ate them after meeting and met my mum. About 10 minutes after eating them I suddenly felt like I had a stitch (sat in mums' car) and felt short of breath and off. My shoulder started hurting and I knew that I'd ingested wheat.

Checked the packaging, and sure enough, they have a 'new improved recipe' and contain wheat. *le sigh*

Was ok for the gym, and did the reptile night at Beavers group. Then came home and collapsed.

Spent all day yesterday unable to walk more than a few steps without going woozy. Had headache and fever all day and kept falling asleep/losing my concentration every few minutes. Tried emptying the dishwasher only to nearly faint and be sent back to bed by Sam (who saw the state of me at 4am and took the day off, thank goodness!)

This morning I feel a bit foggy, but my head is much better and I've emptied the dishwasher successfully. Hoping to continue to improve and get to the gym tonight too.

One thing I did manage to get done yesterday, was place an order with Sports Direct. Had said to Sam that I would like a pair of shoes for running outdoors in, as I want to keep my gym shoes 'gym clean' - and bought myself a pair of trail shoes. Lunarfly gore-tex. Lovely. ^_^

I'm loving the gym, but find running on the treadmill really hard, mentally. I like feeling my body move when I run, I like to daydream and 'escape' - for whatever reason I can't do that on the treadmill.
Having a pair of shoes just WAITING to go get messy with me, on non gym days would be so good. To be able to whack them on and go is what I need. Even if they're pink..

Huge and lovely surprise when they arrived today, think the courier was a little worried by the strung out, giddy-happy lady he had to deliver to!

To get free delivery, I went shopping in the sale - got Seth a pair of Airwalks (he's in love) and picked up a cheap but comfy looking pair of Lee Coopers. The jeans cost £1.99, and are a size 14. My goal is to fit them for New Year. I want to be fitting these jeans, with a BMI under 30 and able to run 5k. I have the time, and when I get there in 10 weeks, I'm going to feel AMAZING.

skinny 14s on a small 18. Give me 10 weeks ^_^

Monday, October 22, 2012

Breaking the 200 barrier

Woohoo! Made it under the 200lb mark in time for Muse on Saturday ^_^ - the same day, 4 years ago that I hit 200lb. I have 23.5lbs to lose in the next 10 weeks, to be 'overweight' instead of 'obese' for the New Year.
Every New Years since 2003/4, I have been 'obese' (and New Years 2003/4 I was miscarrying my first baby, so didn't ring that one in with much gusto!). For the last decade of new years I have felt down/outright depressed about the state of my physical health/state. It will be AMAZING to start the year feeling like I'm on track,to not have such a MOUNTAIN of work in front of me.

previous weight -201.5 BMI 34.6
current weight - 198.5 BMI 34.1
Loss - 3lb
% loss - 1.5%

Rachael had a fab loss this week too, despite all the food that was about on Saturday to catch us out! She lost 3.2lbs and won this weeks' 'biggest loser' title. Spent a few minutes on paint this afternoon making her a certificate, and jogged to the postbox and back.^_^

Still, am very, very pleased with my week. I really did want to be sub200 this week, and to lose a whole extra lb is brilliant. Just so happens that the total weight I have lost is the same amount as the twins weigh (each).

Holding Anya up high, and pleased I'm not carting all that extra fat, water and skin about anymore, carrying my girl-things is much more pleasant!

 Went to the gym after weightwatchers, and threw my poor body at the machines. Going to up the time spent on bike soon - have hit 5km a few times on hills now, time to extend distance/time.

Cycle Kilimanjaro lvl 11 10min 5.05km
Treadmill hill lvl 10 15min 1.52km 45mtrs
Row - 1km 4.50min

Shoulder press 25kg 3x12
Fly  47.5kg 3x12 (l2)
Leg press 70kg 3x12
Leg extension 45kg 3x12 seat3,10,l.
Abductor 56kg 3x12
Adductor 35kg (l5) 3x12
Pull down 47.5kg 3x12

Have a busy week coming up, but am feeling confident that I can track through it, and come out next week close to being out of the 14 stones (3lbs to lose to do that).

walked/cycled/ran -  7.1 miles
31/31 propoints eaten.

Sunday, October 21, 2012

The Biggest Loser (Winter 2012)

So my friend Rachael is a bit awesome, and had a fantabulous idea a couple weeks back. To support/push/compete through the last few weeks of the year by doing our own 'biggest loser' (Yes, we both watch the program, it's just brilliant, why wouldn't we!?)

We've both put on weight since we met 12 years (?!?!) ago at college, and want to shift it.

Starting October 8th, we have been eating cleaner, moving more and hearing Jillian Michael's voice in our sleep. There are twelve weeks until 2013. I want to be 175lbs by then, overweight instead of obese. The first new years since I've had my kids that I'll have NOT been obese. That would be epic. I need to lose 28.5lbs in those 12 weeks to do it. Game face on.

weekdatejoy %rachael %
week 1oct 15th0.980.1
week 2oct 22nd1.51.8
week 3oct 29th00.5
week 4nov 5th1.76+0.8
week 5nov 12th0.770.8
week 6nov 19th1.810.51
week 7nov 26th1.321.55
week 8dec 3rd2.130.31
week 9dec 10th+1.090.1
week 10dec 17th2.7+0.1
week 11dec 24th1.392.1
week 12dec 31st1.690.53

week 1
week 2 
week 3 
week 4
week 5

week 6 
week 7
week 8
week 9
week 10
week 11

The big Three O. Without the big blow out.

Went to the gym last night and had a GOOD workout ready for GOOD food today.

Cycle - cascades lvl 11 2.5km 5.13min
          - foothills lvl 11 2.5km 4.47min
Treadmill 20min c25k w2 2.39km
Treadmill hill walk 5 min @ 5.2kph 

Shoulder press 25kg 3x12
Fly  45kg 3x12 
Leg press 70kg 3x12 
Leg extension 45kg 3x12 
Abductor 56kg 3x12  
Adductor 35kg (l5) 3x12 
Pull down 47.5kg 3x12 

Got back at 10.30pm and got straight to the kitchen to start on the birthday buffet ^_^ Put on 4kg of pork shoulder in the slow cooker overnight, and glitter sprayed the main cake and stuck 30 candles in.

Went to bed with an extra person - for the first time in AGES, we had Seth sleep in with us, because his tummy felt rough, still post-viral, poor baby.

Woke a couple times through the night to check the pork, then up and busy in the kitchen from 9am-3pm. Made chilli con carne, roast chicken, and BBQ pulled pork, as well as baking and icing cupcakes with the kids, as well as clearing and cleaning the flat.

Had the food all done for 6.30pm, and had 8 people over to feed. Seemed to go down well, and once I sat down tonight and tracked, I realised I ate *exactly* my 31 propoints today. I took the smaller potatoes, skipped the nachos, and loaded on the salad, peppers and onion. (And had 2 fairy cakes and a scoop of ice cream, that moderation thing..)

My friend Rachael (who came up with our biggest loser challenge) made it over for the evening, and presented me with an AWESOME certificate for my weight loss week one, where I was the 'most massive of losers' Bwahaha. Loving it. I have picked out her 'prize' already, have it in my cupboard. While I want to lose lots, I wouldn't mind not winning because the prize is really magnificent, if I do say so myself.

Thursday, October 18, 2012


previous weight - 203.5 BMI 34.9
current weight - 201.5 BMI 34.6
Loss - 2lb
% loss - 0.98%

I can smell that 200lb barrier!

Got to stay to the meeting Monday, we were talking about our mini-goals, and I shared mine, of getting under the BMI barrier of 30 for the new year. I've got 11 weeks to lose the 26.5lbs needed to do it - just under 2.5lb a week, game on.

Went to gym after meeting, having eaten fairly recently so felt I'd have to take the cardio slow, still managed a decent-ish workout.

Cross trainer kilamanjaro  lvl5 10min 1.69km
Treadmill hill lvl10 20min 1.87km 58 metres

Shoulder press (2x12) 25kg (1x12) 22.5kg
Fly  42.5kg 3x12
Leg press 70kg 3x12
Leg extension 45kg 3x12
Abductor (1x12)49kg 56kg 3x12
Adductor 28kg (l5) 3x12
Pull down 45kg 3x12

Did beavers in the evening, kids cooked fairy cakes and again, knowing now that I *can't* eat the wheat,  I wasn't even tempted. No aquafit after, as my tattoo is still too new, another week or so until I get back in the pool.

Tuesday was Kai's last group session for occupational therapy, he's done so well (and got a little certificate to say so!) just an hour of crawling about and lifting him in bizarre ways, then we rushed over to Reigate to do 45minutes of rugby before heading home. Spent the evening lifting heavy vivaria around my room, so a decent workout there too...

Today was typical humpday, Seth is ill (think he has a throaty virus my mum did last week) so we stayed in and did housework and food planning for Saturday (Sam's nacho party!) Did get to the gym tonight though and had a good go round and upped a few weights. Noticed my arms looking a lot leaner as I was working, and was grinning like a mad person.

Cycle cascades lvl10 10min 4.94km
Treadmill hill lvl10 15min 1.41km 46 mts climbed
Treadmill fit test 1 @ 5.6kph - vo2 max - 32.1
                       test 2 @ 5.2kph - vo2 max -33.6

Shoulder press 3x12 25kg
Fly  42.5kg 3x12
Leg press 70kg 3x12
Leg extension 45kg 3x12
Abductor 56kg 3x12
Adductor 35kg (l5) 3x12
Pull down 45kg 3x12

Also took 10 minutes to use the treadmill for fit test, found my vo2 max was around 32-33, which one source had as just on the threshold for 'average', but I've found a 'meaner' table, and I am there I am in the middle of 'below average'. (Yay for not being poor/very poor now though, certainly would have been 3/4 months ago).
Will aim to do the test each week going forward, I want to be 'excellent' ^_^ Will settle for being (at the high end of) average (and 'overweight') for the end of the year though.

Age (years)
excellent> 56> 52> 45> 40> 37> 32
above average42-4639-4434-3731-3328-3125-27
below average33-3731-3427-3025-2722-2419-21
very poor< 28< 26< 22< 20< 18< 17

Sunday, October 14, 2012

No weak-ends here.

I feel really tired this weekend, am not medicating with food though, just acknowledging that I am tired, and letting others know. Not worrying about stuff that can wait, but doing what needs doing, otherwise being restful and calm.

It's working.

To be fair, I've had my period, and a busy week (what's new) my body is healing a new tattoo - it's to be expected that I may need a quieter day on occasion!

Yesterday was spent waiting in for the xbox to arrive and having my family visit to 'do' birthday cakes. (Mine was a couple weeks back, my sister and brother both this week). So my parents, siblings and brother in law came up for a couple of hours, with cakes. 

I had my results back from the lab stating that yes, my blood sample had shown I had antibodies. No big surprise, but now it feels like there's no way the voice in my head saying 'maybe a little is fine, maybe the pain is eating too much food, and not the wheat at all...' will be taken seriously.

My sister had a giant cupcake. Moist chocolate cake with heaps of chococream icing. My brother had a marzipan madeira. I had a (lovely!) vegan, wheat-free dutch apple cake. I cut the others up, and dished out without even considering having any. Had a small slice of the 'safe' cake, and after everyone had gone, cleared away the leftovers. Didn't think to eat any, or have to restrain myself, the desire wasn't there - yay!

Spent some time finding games to download (or the trial versions at least) once the kids were in bed. Found a Biggest Loser game, downloaded the trial - thought maybe it would come in useful for a home workout some days.

This morning Sam has gone out with Seth and the girls, shopping for a new coat, leaving me and Kai alone for a bit. He's been playing xbox and we've both had a go at the fitness/movement stuff.

We got Kinect Sports 2 free with the console bundle. It's a fun game (track and field world champ now, me) and after London 2012 the kids are a lot more aware of competitive sport, so will probably rate it more than they might have done 6 months ago. Dance Central 2 download came free too, have done 4 tracks on 2 player with Kai and had a good laugh. Hardly a work out, but fun and better than sitting on the sofa!
Had a go at the Biggest Loser trial workout, which although only 10 minutes long, heh(!) WORKS you out!!
Will be buying that one for days I cannot get to the gym/snow etc. Really did push me. And the globby blobby 'me' jelly sculpture in the bottom right was motivation enough. (It looks even worse when moving, all the wobbly bits wobble!!!  Have probably done about 45 minutes light jumping about, as well as 20 minutes working properly - which can't hurt on an 'off' day!

Plotting a light dinner, and maybe a run later.

Friday, October 12, 2012

Full on Friday

Whew, it's been a day today! Went to get my sleeve worked on yesterday - working out means my tolerance for pain is much better again, ha. Have the waves for Maya on my arm now, next to the boys' dragonflies and the saffron flower for Anya.

This morning I got up and out early, to hit the gym running at 8am. It was super busy because 2 sessions in the fitness studio had been cancelled. My legs were also still feeling weak and stiff and crap, but managed to bust out a decent session. Used hills in both my jog and cycle to ease my poor crampy legs into working hard. Every time I moved, I was congratulating myself on being at that gym, not still in bed. I'm saving my life in those moments.

Cycle cascades bike mode L10 10min (4.75km)
Treadmill hill l vl9 15min 1.66km meters 35
Row lvl 10 1031 4.52min

Shoulder press 22.5kg 3x12
Fly  42.5kg 3x12
Leg press 65kg 3x12
Leg extension 45kg 3x12
Abductor 49kg 3x12
Adductor 28kg (l5) 3x12
Pull down 42.5kg 3x12

Got home and spent the day sorting bits for the next week or so (my sisters, brothers, and Sam's birthdays in the next week) and then took Seth out for his swimming lesson. (2 miles hill walk, great)
Home, time to do a quick wash and clean out the reptiles, then back out for my second gym session of the day - am fairly certain I can push the levels a bit come Monday now, psychological block should have scurried back a bit after I accidentally lifted an extra 10kg on the leg press, having not checked it carefully!!

Cycle bike mode L11 10min (4.97km)
Treadmill 3km in 24.17min - c25k w2

Shoulder press 22.5kg 3x12
Fly  42.5kg 3x12
Leg press 75kg 3x12
Leg extension 45kg 3x12
Abductor 49kg 3x12
Adductor 28kg (l5) 3x12
Pull down 42.5kg 3x12

 Have my family all over tomorrow, bringing cake for my brother & sisters' birthdays. We should also be getting our new Xbox (family anniversary present we finally saved for) so while everyone eats cake, I'll play fruit ninja!

Thursday, October 11, 2012

Getting a little bit leaner

Yesterday was a good day, stayed on track and spent time de-cluttering the house some more. In the evening I went to my interviews with the appointment committee. I am now a probationary beaver scout assistant leader person. Woohoo. Modular training starts in January so I can take a break thinking about it lots for now. Was full of nervous energy after leaving the house at 8.30pm, so went to the gym for a 'quickie' which helped calm me down.

Cycle bike mode L12 5min 95rpm (2.54km)
Treadmill hill lvl 9 15min 1.55km meters 33

Shoulder press 22.5kg 3x12
Fly  42.5kg 3x12
Leg press 65kg 3x12
Abductor 49kg 3x12
Adductor 28kg (l5) 3x12
Pull down 42.5kg 3x12

It's been 16 weeks since I did a mini health check, about time to do another -

Weight - 203.5lbs (down 30.5lb)
BMI - 34.9 (down 5.3)
Obese Class 1 : Obesity (
BP - 109/66 (down 5/10)
Pulse (resting) 62 (down 25)

Wearing size 18 clothes (loose).
Bra size - 42D (using bra calculator)

Neck - 13.5" (-1")
Boobs - 44" (-6")
Right Arm (right at the fatty pit) - 14.25" (-2.25")
Left Arm - 14.5" (-2.5")
Waistline (smallest part just above navel) - 36" (-9")
Belly bulge - 48" (-6")
Hips - 46" (-4")
Right Thigh - 28" (-3.5")
Left Thigh - 28" (-3") 
 - down 37.25" !!

Body Fat calculator - 27.33 - down 1.16% 

Hip to Waist ratio - 0.78 - low risk. (down from 0.90 - high risk is >0.85) 

Wednesday, October 10, 2012

2 stone down

Woohoo. Not obese AND I've earned my Indigo Butterfly back, having lost 2 stone now.

Seeing as I already have my lovely flutterby, I am going to buy myself another pressie for this stone, like I did with my choccywoccydoodah apron for the first stone back in July.

I am being really good about preparing my own food, and have wanted mechanical scales for ages, I love how they look. So I have retired my digital scales, they will be kept for weighing the tortoises!

Hopefully my apron and scales will keep me feeling motivated over the next 12 weeks - I hope to manage my 3rd and 4th stones in that time!

Tuesday, October 09, 2012

Tuesday Trekker

Tuesdays, for the last few weeks have been BUSY days. Kai's having a new group therapy, under the occupational therapy department - but only for 4 weeks, and then they will discharge him from the service. I wasn't sure how he'd cope with having the group work in the morning, followed by more group work an hour later at Rugbytots, but he's done brilliantly so far.

Tuesdays have been getting everyone up and dressed and fed, Kai's backpack packed with his rugger stuff, nappies etc, and appropriate lunch, bus fare and homework for OT. Then getting over to the hospital (2 trains and a bus away, thankfully we've been offered lifts over from my family) spending an hour doing floor work and deep pressure stuff = achy knees and arms mummy! Then we have to rush out, get on a bus and change Kai while on the bus, then walk *quickly* while munching flapjack and a banana to Rugbytots, then play for 45minutes (yes, that means me too) then walk *quickly 20 minutes to the train to get back (with a mile uphill walk after 3 trains) home for 4pm. *Whew*

Dinner on, washing on, kids changed and I have a cuppa...

and today we had fish and chips (gluten free Tuesday, yay!) because I am just snackered and I will not let my gym/gluten-free/clean home go, but I can bust into my weeklies happily.

Tomorrow I have to go to meet the Appointment Advisory Committee for Scouts, to talk about me becoming a leader assistant type, at 8pm. Mum is going to take me, and we are plotting to go do gym after too, really don't want to miss a day! My period this month arrived sneakily and has not caused me too much pain. I just feel tired and my legs are weaker than I#d like!! Still, managed to get some sweat worked up yesterday -

Cycle bike mode L12 10min 85rpm (4.61km)
Treadmill hill lvl 9 15min 1.65km meters 36
Row 900m 5min (gentle, ouch period)

Shoulder press 22.5kg 3x12
Chest press 42.5kg 3x12
Leg press 65kg 3x12
Abductor 49kg 3x12
Adductor 28kg (l5) 3x12

Hoping this will continue to be the case as I lose weight, if I could get to the point where I am getting almost no pain with my periods all the time it would be AMAZING. I still had a 3 day migraine, but it was a lot less severe than I have been used to. ^_^ Body fitness is obviously improving, took my blood pressure tonight and it was 109/66 with a heartrate of 62. Nice. :)

Monday, October 08, 2012

Grin and Bare it v2

I have to chuckle at myself, reading back sometimes. When I started blogging my weightloss I was 24. I had been overweight for only 4 years, and pregnant 3 times, so total time spent just being overweight was less than 2 years. I was young (yes, I am only 29 now, but wow do these years of motherhood grow up a person fast!) and especially young in how I saw my body/health. When I first went to weightwatchers my main reason to lose weight was to 'look nice' and 'fit clothes I like'. Don't get me wrong, I still want those things, but they are not reasons that motivate me day to day.
I want to be pain free.
I want to run.
I want to have a diabetes free life.
I want to have a longer life.
I want my blood pressure to remain safe.
I want to be able to keep up with my kids.
I want to be able to enjoy good food.
I want to be able to not think about how I look.
I want to be able to pull on clothes and not worry about if they fit.

October 2012 - 203.5lbs
& right now I *am* doing all these things, already.
The weight loss is of course fantastic, it is doing heaps for my fitness and mobility and just feeling good about myself, but is just an outward sign of the inner stuff that's happening, that is where the truly amazing changes are happening. I am not in pain day to day now, there's still a background ache, but it doesn't 'register' unless I think about it. I am running again, my body is becoming healthier already. I am spending more time enjoying my children, eating good whole food - and giving the kids the gift of an active & healthy lifestyle. I've gone through my wardrobe each week and ditched too-big clothes so I can reach in, grab and dress without stress.

The last couple of months I have really stopped worrying about my size in terms of  'how I look' and stripped to a swimsuit three times now to swim. I am not letting the fat hold me back. I am stronger than it is ^_^

May 2009 - 50bs lighter than now - BMI 27 - I was actually unconvinced that I was *acceptable* enough to be ok to take my 4 year old son swimming. I was a size 12. I didn't feel ok with myself, I was not running, or enjoying the kids actively, or feeling comfortable with myself. I couldn't even look at the camera.

September 2010 - 30lbs lighter than now - 16 months later I had grown up a bit, been back up and down the scale and was aware of my size, but wanted to enjoy my holiday and let the kids swim. Being away gave me the confidence to just do it. And I was feeling good about changes in my body too - eyes to camera.

From September 2010 until September 2012 I did not attempt once to go swimming. I took Seth for lessons, but didn't go in until last month, when I got fed up with the 'wait to be an 'ok' size' mentality, and decided to get on with living.

No-one has dropped dead seeing me at >200lb in the pool. I have enjoyed aquafit, the kids loved going swimming together, I'm going to carry on grinning as I bare it. ^_^

Just plain OBESE. ^_^

I've been over the line to morbidly obese (just, and WOW, I felt it), spent a fair amount of time being severely obese, both on the way up and down. But today I weighed in as just 'obese'.
My BMI is now >35, I am a week or two away from getting under the 200lb mark.

So many times I have said 'this is the last time' etc.. I am not going to do that this time. I have a feeling that if I let it go again, being able to get back up could prove to be too hard. I acknowledge where I am, and am grateful for how much better I feel. I want to be under 30 BMI for the start of 2013. I look forward to the next 12 weeks of good food and exercise that will get me there.

previous weight - 207 BMI 35.5 
current weight - 203.5 BMI 34.9
Loss - 3.5lb 
% loss - 1.7%

Got a message from my friend R last night asking if we could do our own 'biggest loser' style event on the countdown to NYE. Starting today we are texting each other our weights and  % lost each Monday - the person who loses the most % over the 12 weeks will be the winner. ^_^ Hopefully we can support each other down the scale.

Saturday, October 06, 2012

Stabby Saturday

Oh noes, lancet. Meep
I've accepted for a while now (3 years, just over?) that I'm *at least* intolerant to wheat gluten.

Symptoms I get when eating wheat (even a little, and without realising I've eaten it, I get symptoms strong enough to affect my daily life) are fairly severe and commonly linked to wheat allergy/intolerance.

Still, I've never been able (yet) to fully commit to staying wheat free for longer than a few weeks at a time. The foods that contain wheat are the foods I crave, the ones I still daydream about, even when totally on track with my exercise and eating.

I need to treat this more seriously, to be CERTAIN that I have a real physical condition that needs treating, that might switch my brain onto behaving more sensibly. I need the absolute switch off, psychologically, from those foods, the way that boycotting Nestle has kept me from buying their produce for 12 years!

My symptoms are really 'classic' - As well as food cravings, I feel chronically tired and unwell. Feeling run down and on the verge of a headcold is 'normal'. I tend to not do much, as my joints are so stiff, moving just hurts too much. My back feels really bad, and sitting for 5-10 minutes leads to spasms in my lower back. As well as the fatigue I feel depressed, find it hard to want to do anything, or care about anything. I would just want to lie in bed and read fiction (and eat more wheat). Other Neurological issues I suffer are panic attacks, memory loss and frequent crippling migraine. A single migraine loses me 1-3 days, and I'd have them almost half of the time.
I get bad IBS eating wheat, painful cramps and bloating and awful wind too. I swing between constipation and needing to go often, and am in pain whenever I do get to the loo. My Gastro-intestinal health on wheat is shot, really. 

That all should be a pretty clear indication to STOP, shouldn't it?

Seeing as I am still struggling to stay away from the evil grain, I thought it might be worth looking into having it officially diagnosed. If I take away any doubt in my mind that it *is* poisoning me, it is serious, and I really cannot eat the stuff.

I've not gone for testing at the clinic before, as I'm fairly sure they'd run tests for coeliac and I've assumed I couldn't have that, as the main symptom listed everywhere is 'weight loss'. Pretty sure that excludes me! My symptoms also seem pretty clear to be a severe intolerance, rather than allergy (no breathing/skin issues) too - so I've stuck to that way of thinking I guess.

Found a lab online that'd do a simple positive/negative IgG test for £10, so I ordered one. The kit arrived this morning, and I stabbed my poor finger to get a sample to send to the lab. They'll test it and I should have a confirmation of IgG antibodies found inside a fortnight. ^_^